tynajoymetzner

A Decade Of Creating My Own Niche

youtube.com/c/TynaMetzner

#YouTubeChannelLink ⬆️

A collection of #music and #tenacity. Nearly a #decade of my #MusicalEfforts. ❤️

#Sophisticated #Covers and #Originals A #mature perspective on the #MusicFromMyHeart

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8 Weeks Of Rocking Around The Clock

This has been the hardest personal time in my life. I’d be lying if I tried to sugar coat it. A harder mind, body and spirit challenge I’ve never encountered. 

My world literally tilted on its axis. I woke up in the middle of the night and extreme vertigo hit me. I got up out of bed and realized I could barely navigate the room. I got very anxious when I couldn’t clear my head. I felt so horrible that I decided I’d better get checked out. I was concerned maybe I was having a stroke. I have been very healthy. I try to take care of myself and I’m an avid walker. I do a ton of yard work and I’m not a person who drinks or takes medication. My lab work suggests I’m in good health, they came back fine. 

My world has been turned upside down since waking up with this affliction 8 weeks ago now. My hearing has been effected and I have a constant buzzing in my ears. My ears feel fluid filled and horrible. The vibration from walking and talking, even chewing is obnoxious. I’m constantly dizzy and if I lay down or move my head too quickly my head spins. I haven’t had a moment of total peace for 8 weeks. I feel as if I’ve been stuck in my head and unable to enjoy anything or anyone for a very long time. I couldn’t drive. I couldn’t even open my eyes the first few days to navigate my phone. It’s been like a prison being stuck like this. 

I’ve had two primary PA’s. A uncaring and expensive Ear Nose and Throat Dr. who just wanted me to take expensive tests. I even had a complete eye exam. I’ve done labs, an MRI, a cat scan and hearing tests… I took two different antibiotics and am currently taking a third. I’ve lost my patience with my dizzy, buzzy head. My symptoms are so strange. Headache in my eyes, numbness in my forehead and sinus cavities. Strange! Anyway, the sensations keep me from being comfortable and from being able to sleep well. I long for an end to this strange affliction. I can’t wait to feel normal and good again. Even with my health issue I have kept up with everything…. House, yard, groceries and cooking. I’ve even been walking in spite of my dizzy head… I’ve been driving surface streets, but not on the freeway. I’m not sure the dizziness won’t be overwhelming at higher speeds. Somehow my eyes are partly involved with this illness. Not a typical sinus infection! 

It would be so wonderful if this latest antibiotic would just wipe out this mystery illness. I’d do a dance of joy in the street! 

Living this extremely helpless and limited life is really tough. I am independent and not good at having to be dependent on people for rides. I’ve really been humbled yet again by this nightmare health dilemma. It also shows me how absolutely ridiculous my marriage is. That’s been the most humbling of all. Being sick and vulnerable in a bad marriage is the most frightening eye opener! When you are married to someone who really doesn’t have any compassion or love for you, it’s really the hardest thing. To have to be vulnerable, where you don’t feel that you can, is the worst. To be blamed for being sick and made to feel as if you are a burden. I hate it! I can’t tell you how many times I’ve thought, “I don’t feel like I can get well being here”. Is this how I want to grow old?! This is the first time in my 20+ marriage that I’ve ever been sick longer than a few days… This has really been a revelation type of experience.

I’m doing my best to try to stay positive. Getting seen by a Drs has been made much more difficult by Covid. I have to schedule appointments way in advance which in my predicament seems hard to fathom. I just can’t bare the idea that I’m going to get stuck like this till??? How am I ever going to figure this out? What the hell happened to me? I want my life back! 

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The Heartache Of DNA Test Results Something To Consider

If you have read my blog lately then you know about the heart aching experience I’ve been trying to navigate through. I recently did an AncestryDNA test and I received the shock of a lifetime! I decided to share my experience in a Vlog post on YouTube. Here is the link! 

The Heartache Of DNA Testing ⬅️

I wish I would have thought more about what my test result could be to my life. I have only heard about all the wonderful stories and outcomes… I really thought I’d only find out more about my heritage and lineage…My descendants, and the countries they were from… I had no idea the can of worms that I’d open and the subsequent shocking revelations to come. I had no reason at all to think that I would find my life to have been born of deceit and deception!

Native American Heritage… who knew?

Six New YouTube Videos Creator Overload

 

I took a whole 2 days in a row to practice and put together 6 new YouTube videos for my channel. It’s fun to be a creator although I haven’t hit their strict metrics for any opportunity to monetize my channel. I haven’t appreciated the fact that although I get many views per month, I haven’t been found eligible to prosper on YouTube. Anyway, it was a terrific feeling to be back to playing and being authentic me! 

Here are the new video links to be found on my YouTube channel… 

Guitar Man – Cover-

You Know Like I Know –Cover- 

Lover Boy -Cover- 

Win – Cover-

Escape -My Original Song-

Praying For Time -Cover-

Here is my channel link! 

Tyna Phipps @YouTube

It really was a wonderful spirit filled day yesterday! 

Yesterday was spirit day at school for this one…For recognition of the 20th anniversary of the 9/11 tragedies. It’s hard to believe that it has been this long. What a horrible day for all who were alive during this time! Awwww my condolences for all of those who were lost and, for the people that miss them. A moment in history that we will never forget! 

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Lost And Found A Winning Weekend

Greetings from Phoenix AZ. It’s still pretty warm but we are getting through a more mild summer here. We had a really productive monsoon season and that has helped to keep the valley cooler than in many years I recall here. 

I have done a lot of walking and chasing my tail this week. With headphones on, listening to my favorite playlist, I managed to drop my house keys out of my pocket. Because I walking and listening to music, I only discovered this after I returned from my 4mi. walk! As you can see below, I retraced my steps like 3 different times. I realized that someone had picked them up early into my search… I was annoyed that someone would do that. I learned a valuable lesson. If you find keys or important things like that…Leave them! The owner will attempt to retrace their steps and if you pick them up they won’t be able to find them!

I put 12 mi. on my feet trying to find them! I was just so focused on finding them. I got a verbal bashing several times for being such an idiot and losing the keys… All day, I heard about how stupid I am. 

Long story short, I posted about losing the keys on our community Facebook page. Sure enough, an older lady in the neighborhood had picked them up while walking her pooch. I am so grateful to have found them! That will teach me to stuff my pockets with water, keys and tissues… oh well, I got some good exercise. 

The storms made a real mess out of the backyard so I spent a morning and afternoon in yard clean up. 

The winter grass died and we didn’t reseed this year with Bermuda… we can reseed at the end of this month when the night time temps begin to get cooler. 

Looking forward to cooler temps and patio dwelling! 

This little gal loves eating Korean food. She has grown to love spicy food. Here is one of my favorites, a Korean pancake. We grabbed a bite Friday night. 

I’m going to bake something for Labor Day. I’ll have to dig around and see what I can come up with. I hope you have a spectacular holiday! 

Meanwhile, I’m going to focus on the “Win”. Those things that your spirit acknowledges you can do. Accomplishment feels good when you can get it. “All you’ve got to do is, win… Here are the lyrics for “Win”.

Me, I hope that I’m crazy
I feel you driving and you’re only the wheel
Slow down, let someone love you
Oh, I’ve never touched you since I started to feel
If there’s nothing to hide me
Then you’ve never seen me hanging naked and wired
Somebody lied, I say it’s hip
To be alive
Now your smile is spreading thin
Seems you’re trying not to lose
Since I’m not supposed to win
All you’ve got to do is win
That’s all you gotta do (ooh, it ain’t over)
Me, I’m fresh on your pages
Secret thinker sometimes listening aloud
Life lies dumb on its heroes
Wear your wound with honor, make someone proud
Someone like you should not be allowed
To start any fires
Now your smile is spreading thin
Seems you’re trying not to lose
Since I’m not supposed to win
All you’ve got to do is win
That’s all you gotta do (ooh, it ain’t over)
Now your smile is spreading thin
Seems you’re trying not to lose
Since I’m not supposed to win
All you’ve got to do is win
That’s all you gotta do (all you got to do is win)
Now your smile is spreading thin (seek and believe in you)
Seems you’re trying not to lose (it ain’t over, no no)
Since I’m not supposed to grin (that’s all you got to do)
All you’ve got to do is win (it ain’t over, no, oh)
(Seek and believe in you)
All you’ve got to do is win (it ain’t over, no, no)
Woo hooh, all you’ve got
Is all you’ve got
(It ain’t over)
It ain’t over

Win written by David Bowie. My Cover- SoundCloud- https://soundcloud.app.goo.gl/M5oageF9reNNyj3j7

Win Cover – YouTube Channel Link

Have a great weekend celebration ❤️.

All Things Must Come And Go

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Dedicated To Bobby- They Don’t Know What’s Right Till They’re Gone

You Know Like I Know written by the Ozark Mountain Daredevils ◀️ My latest SoundCloud track.

Everybody Knows All Things Must Come And Go…

This has a new vibe for me. I think I’ll dedicate this to my father Bobby… his family was from Muskogee, Oklahoma. He however, was born in Bakersfield, CA.

 The lyrics fit well… Although I didn’t write the lyrics, I have always been drawn to them! Now, it makes sense to me. 

I hope that wherever he is in the afterlife, he knows that I now know of him! I also hope to be able to meet him when my time on earth is done here. I’m thinking maybe he didn’t even know of me? 

Meanwhile I have plenty of bucket list dreams to conquer and achieve… 

To take a look and walk away
Isn’t a stand, man
To speak the words that everyone’s heard
Isn’t the way, man- Everybody knows,
All things must come and go but
You know like I know that
Everything’s gonna be alright
People just come and go
They don’t know what’s right
Till they’re gone. Your sun will rise and set today
Just don’t you worry
And everything will come your way
Just don’t you hurry- Take a little time
And find you some peace of mind then
You’ll know like I know that
Everything’s gonna be alright
People just come and go
They don’t know what’s right
Till they’re gone

 tynajoymetzner

Changing With The Seasons Of Life

Filling my days and nights with domesticity. Not that it is appreciated. You know the saying, no good deed goes unpunished? People pleasing doesn’t serve me well here! Neither do old notions, and family dynamics. Living with an angry person for many years, takes a toll. I could never have imagined how difficult marriage could be… I’ve reached a point within myself that I realize that I’m not able to succeed in this job. It’s a losing proposition. You can’t change people. They are who they want to be. When they impose their anger on you for the most ridiculous things, it’s time to do something else! I didn’t sign up for being a punching bag. Verbal or physical, it doesn’t matter, I’m out! I’ve been out for a long time. I removed myself in spirit, long ago! I’ve held up my obligations to the family and it’s been an all consuming job. I’ve done the best that I can. I get up every day and I say, “I’m going to do the best that I can with this day!” I can hear Dr. Phil say, “How’s that working for ya?”

I got that off of my chest. I wrote this song some years ago, and I’m still sitting in the same vantage point.

Something More my original composition 

My daughter moved into her first apartment. She and 3 of her besties. She is starting her sophomore year at ASU. I’m hoping for the best for her as it is a lot of responsibility for all of these kids! She has resumed her job working at a campus Starbucks. She will be busy this year! 

My furniture has blankets on it because my border collie jumps on it lol. Her nails could rip the heck out of it. I love fall colors! I decorate for all of the seasons but I think fall, is my favorite.

My cat boy loves to watch me craft. He is great company ❤️! 

For my dining room table.

Pumpkin Pie is one of my favorite pies to make. I am a pumpkin spice lover. The colors and flavors of fall make me smile!

What would the notion of fall be without Pumpkin Pie? So, I made one. We have had a real monsoon season here in Phoenix this summer! A lot of storms and rain. I’m glad for all of this weather. I have enjoyed the thunder storms!